Monday, July 19, 2004

Fred's Confession

What a dreamboat. A man like that just makes you want to stand up and say "I am Sparticus!" So that is one mystery solved, and he has taken full responsibility for his crime.

He has inspired me to make a confession of my own. I'm kinda scared to share this...

It was a hot and sweaty night just over a year ago and I was feeling restless, not sure what would quench my desires...

I called that hunky guy Bob, the one with the sexy dark nose hairs and close set eyes...

In my huskiest voice I pretended to be someone I wasn't... He seemed to be interested, barely distracted by the gasping hitch of my voice...

I told him about my beautiful Valerie and how she didn't even know of my existence and how she needed to be disiplined for her disinterest in me. Bob understood that in a way only a man of his stature could possibly know.

He explained that he was feeling hot and restless too. There was a vibrating Crescendo of excitement on the line as we jointly penned that little story , the one that put him back on top. *gasp*

Things would have been just fine after that, but that lousy meddler David Corn went on to publish an article about how a crime had been committed.

So they have interviewed an unknown number of "top White House officials", hired a special council and lawyered up the president.

Lawyered up the president, imagine that. Say it a few times to yourself and see if you don't start to feel steamy too. OOh... er sorry.

I guess that I have caused enough trouble now, and that Valerie Plame should have been properly chastised by now. So I am sorry.

Not really. I strive to be sufficiently "unapologetic" and issue a non apology apology to the King of Jordan like my lord Whiner.

So you see, this whole outing of a CIA agent was really nothing for you to worry your little heads about.

Go shopping!


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